An Energy Scale

When something is further away the light reflecting off that thing takes more time to reach your eyes than something that is close. I believe this is true of time as well; when something is a long time off, it seems to have less pull on your thoughts. Well, the summer is winding down and in a few weeks I will be starting grad school. In a few weeks. Just a few, precious, significant weeks. It feels like every actions, every thought, every hope revolves around these few weeks. Today I felt mentally drained and didn't want to go down to Ada where I've been horseback riding all summer (I know, we'll talk about it), but then after hanging out with Evan was out of the question I suddenly thought... there are only a few weeks left.

The same thing happened a couple nights ago when I thought I would just be by myself for the night and not go stay with Evan, but then I thought... there are only a few weeks left. 

[read 'desperately philosophical'] What is this? The end of my life as I know it? The beginning of a new chapter? Am I becoming someone different? ... Why am do I allow myself to make this into a big ordeal when I know at my core that this was the best summer of my life already? I know that no matter whether I have to spend my days alone, I am loved by and will always love my best friend. It's not just a few weeks left, it's the rest of my life I have to give. It's also just another day. And then another. And another. It's hard not to make a big ordeal out of moving away for the first time (yea, the first year of college didn't really count), but at the end of the day it will just be another 24 hours.

I've always believed in cutting out the drama, so now I need to do it again... not more singing LeAnn Rimes' How Do I Live (don't remember it? a dramatic song about going on without the person you love; click the title of the song for a refresher) every time I think about living in Johnson City without Evan. No more weird dreams about things happening to Felix, the horse I've spent this summer with. No more being mad when my friends don't feel the gravity of my impending move. 

There are only 24 hours each day, and despite the fact that I want to spend every single one of them with the people I love, I'M THE ONE LEAVING. And that's ok. Because there's such a thing as trust. I trust that this summer has meant just as much to the people I've spent it with as it has to me. 

The photos in this post are from the roadtrip my brother and I took this summer. I really hope this becomes a summer ritual for us. I freaking love it.

Also, this is the first time in four months I've written anything at all. I flew past my one year anniversary of having a blog without even blinking. And yes, I DID just listen to How Do I Live while writing this, and I hope the song is just finishing as you finish up reading it...

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. - Buddha

Summer {Music} Lovin'

I went through a lot of music this summer. A lot more than I can probably recollect. But I guess that's what happens when you constantly look for more music and buy albums. Here are some albums I bought and played the hell out of. There are several more artists I wanted to buy but music's expensive! Not as expensive as art though haha. I know not all of these are the newest, but good music isn't always the most recent (actually, it normally isn't)

Florence + The Machine's Ceremonials

Tegan and Sara's The Con

Maroon 5's Hands All Over

Fleet Foxes' Helplessness Blues

The Decemberists' The King Is Dead

Norah Jones' Little Broken Hearts

Neko Case's Middle Cyclone

St Vincent's Strange Mercy

Kimbra's Vows

And these are probably my favorite songs from each album:

Trying to pick up the pace, trying to make it so I never see your face again. Time to throw this away want to make sure that you never waste my time again.

Norah Jones – Happy Pills

Post-Game Recap

As you may have noticed if you read my posts regularly, I did not post Monday or Tuesday. Agh! I have been thinking for the past month that I may have to cut back on my posting come school time, but I thought it would be more of a choice than a necessity. Silly me. Well, I'm less than a week out and already feel like I have places to be and things to do, so on and so forth.

I really can't believe there are only 4 days left until classes start. I feel like this has been the longest summer in the world though so it's not that my break is ending too soon, but it has just gone on so long that it is a little unreal all that I have done and that it's coming to an end.

Recap on my summer of traveling:

Celebrated my 21^st birthday in Ohio with my dad.

Revamped my bedroom and livingroom.

Drove down to Texarkana, TX to live with me mum for a few months.

Visited Miami, FL.

Visited Ozark National Forest and the Cossatot.

Went to Dallas for a Rangers v. Tigers game.

Roadtripped through OK, KS, NB, SD, WY, CO, UT, AZ, NM, hitting up Badlands, Mt Rushmore, Devils Tower, Grand Teton, Yellowstone, Rocky Mountain, Zion, and Grand Canyon national parks.

Roadtripped through LA, MS, AL, GA, NC, TN, WV, stopping in Great Smoky Mountain National Park.

He who does not travel does not know the value of men. – Moorish proverb