There are a lot of things that roll around in my mind while I make art, and I generally hijack discussions about my art as a time to all at once unload the passing thoughts I've had over the course of weeks. Honestly, I blame Evan. I can think of at least three ways to blame him, my boyfriend/fiance/partner (I'm not really sure where this relationship is going, other than forward, so I'm leaving options). He'd tell me that if I can only think of three ways to blame him then I must be slipping up.
In reality I don't actually blame him... I blame my ideas, or at least the ideas that have been supplanted in me, about blogging. In general I suffer from a condition called Listening Too Much. It's really serious. Sometimes it's misdiagnosed as Caring About What Others Think Too Much, but honestly people need to stop misusing that diagnosis. Some people believe that blogging, Twitter, Facebook, <insert social media of choice here> is just a way for people to put all of their thoughts out there that no one cares about. I can't think of any thought more hurtful to plant in someone's mind; no one cares what you have to say.
Then why write? Why make art? Why write a song? Why do anything that involves anything other than going to your job, doing what you're told, then going home and doing your duty by your wife?
I don't have any answer to these questions. I search daily to find the answers because I know they exist. Currently what it comes down to for me is that I really love communicating with people. I also like thinking. But your mind is a vast universe crashing through the cosmos with no direction sometimes, ya know? No? Maybe? I would just really like to start using my blog to get all this sediment flushed out. There are so many impactful things in our lives, and, as so many movie directors like to point out (thank you Into the Wild), why bother if at the end of the day you can't pass on your knowledge?
The world is exciting... and I'm excited to get excited again about the excitement of this exciting world.
By the way, if you haven't seen Into the Wild, or if you haven't watched it today, or if your little sister stole it from you because she absolutely needed to have it at all times (sorry, Robert) then check it out: watch a clip here or watch the whole movie (at your own risk, because I'm pretty sure it's still illegal - 100% sure) here.
Some Shakespeare for your enlightenment:
Oh, when she’s angry, she is keen and shrewd!
She was a vixen when she went to school.
And though she be but little, she is fierce.